April 21, 2013

Locked Inside

passing the time during friday's lock-down

I wrote about our experience at the Marathon a week ago, we felt such gratitude for our own safety and so heartbroken for all of those who were hurt in those tragic events. In the days that followed, the news focused on the explosions, but I chose not to watch or listen to any reports. It's not for lack of empathy, actually I think I am too emotional and can get pulled in so deeply that it isn't healthy or productive. 

James prefers to be connected and know what's going on, he always listens to the radio in the morning. On Friday Little Smith woke up early, just before six. The radio clicked on and I heard it get louder and louder. There had been a shoot out less than a mile from our house, a suspect was on the loose, we were in the area that was on lock-down until further notice, stay inside, doors locked, subways and buses were suspended. Later the lock-down would extend to the entire city of Boston, which still amazes me... that's a lot of people. 

My first thought was that I wanted to run away, to drive to my mom's a few hours west. The roads were closed though, and as I said we were supposed to stay put. We locked all the doors, opened the windows to let the balmy seventy degree air fill the house, and pitched a tent in our office... so we could pretend like we were outside even if we were stuck indoors. 

The streets were completely silent, the only sounds were constant low flying helicopters and occasional police and ambulance cars. It was a very strange experience, and it did feel like some war torn place and not like my home. I knew that logically we were pretty safe, and I'm a logical girl, but my mind did wander a few times... to the basement door that had been unlocked through the night until we heard the news, to the loose window in our ramshackle garage. It's difficult not to let these anxieties creep in when it's all so close, especially when you have a small child and want to ensure he's protected.

Little Smith got antsy half way though the day, the weather was the warmest it had been all season and he pressed his face against the window screen and demanded 'me go outside now!'. We tried to redirect him, we played in the tent and drew pictures and read books and made cookies and played in the tent again. 

Shortly after we put Little Smith down to sleep, we heard the news that the suspect had been caught. It was over, finally. The whole thing is tragic on so many levels, but I was incredibly relieved to have it all come to an end. I'm looking forward to turning the page on this week, to starting a fresh new Monday and celebrating Earth Day and just getting back to life as usual. I'm very grateful that I can do all of that, and again, I'm so sorry to those who are still hurting from this very difficult week here in Boston.

18 comments:

  1. I can't imagine being so close. xo

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    1. Yes, it was far too close- but luckily we were safe. Thanks Katie.

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  2. I cannot imagine this either Lilly. As you said...tragic on so many levels. I had no idea you were so close. Take care x

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    1. Thank you Jane, relieved to have it behind us.

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  3. So glad that you are all safe--

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  4. Must have been a really awful experience, I was terrified by it all even though I was at the other side of the world! So glad they caught them.

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    1. I'm glad too, sad situation but at least it's over. Thank you!

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  5. This hits close to home, I live in Medford and saw the scores of police, emts, and national gaurd vehicles on there way to your town. I'm so glad you and your family are safe. Hopefully it will be a quiet week of healing...

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    1. Thank you Alison, it was strange to be so close- right? I am looking forward to a quiet week as well.

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  6. So so scary. You did a great job keeping Wyatt occupied and happy, so pats on the back to you. Glad you are safe and sound.

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    1. Thanks Ruthie, it helped to have James at home too... somehow it was harder than our usual days at home though, I think it was the weather.

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  7. I was thinking of you all Friday, watching the news, riddled with anxiety.

    What a strong city you are part of. I was so inspired by their immediate reactions of solidarity and determination.

    We were very relieved to see it over, as horrifying as the details are. Also happy you made the most of it in your little makeshift urban campground. Now, get out and enjoy that sun!

    Xx
    J

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    1. Thanks Jessica, we are appreciating the outdoors even more than usual now. It's good to have it behind us.

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  8. Oh my - I'm so glad you are all OK...such scary stuff. I'm not big on the news, but like yours my hubby likes to stay connected too. I'm so glad it's all over and things have settled...I hope.

    take care,

    Nina x

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    1. Thank you Nina, things do feel settled now- and we're grateful for that.

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  9. I am totally like you. I can't hear too much about the news. I think when you have kids everything hits you harder.

    I think it's lovely that you turned a trying situation into a lovely family day for Little Smith.

    I would have locked those windows tight and peered out regularly. ;)

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  10. I really can't imagine how surreal it all must have been and how hard to have to stay in with such an otherwise beautiful day. I am a lot like you in that I would have worried about those locks or the loose windows and would have had a hard time making my wheels stop spinning, but I am glad to see you all making the most of your time together during this extremely sad time. Hopefully you have many sunny days ahead to get out there and enjoy your beautiful city.

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