January 24, 2015

Details D1.03 / In Which My Toddler Does Not Sleep

winter's nap my monkey and his monkey afternoon sun 4PM breakfast blooms persistent pumpkins weekly bread busy babes dust and light winter's nap II

It's nearing midnight, and I'm feeling the moderate delirium of long term sleep deprivation and a glass and a half of red wine. I guess I am going to type 'out loud' that baby Roo is a straight up lousy sleeper. She is now 18 months old, and she's still waking up through the night, and rising so early that it barely qualifies as morning. It's torture. It's clearly retribution for having been graced with such a beautiful sleeper the first go around, and the only one who doesn't seem to be bothered in the least is Roo herself. She is chipper and ready to greet the day in the pitch black of predawn. The girl just doesn't need sleep... wonder where she gets it from?!

Sleep issues aside, I have been having the feeling lately that I'm in a good place and life is smooth and blissful, but that it's all just taking a ridiculous amount of effort; I've been doing more projects and baking with the kids, we've been getting outside quite a bit, we are trying to visit James at work occasionally during the day, since he often works dawn to way past dusk, I'm making a point of trying new recipes, the kids are full of energy and enthusiasm and insanity, I started up classes again twice a week... I can literally step outside myself at any given moment in the day and be completely content and happy and grateful... but somehow the accumulation of all of those moments is exhausting. Then again... we may not be able to set those sleep issues aside after all. I have a feeling everything would look a little different on a good eight hours of sleep. 

Before I do tuck into bed for the night (and cross every finger that I can string together a few hours before anyone starts crying), can I just say that I don't understand or enjoy football on any level whatsoever? I think this may be my very first mention of sports in the three years that I've been keeping this journal (with good cause... boring!). I actually do enjoy baseball on occasion, but football is just excruciating. Throughout my childhood, I regarded Superbowl Sunday as the time to observe a good Murder She Wrote marathon... and this week, I was smack in the middle of one of my favorite movies, Hannah and Her Sisters, when James came bursting through the door eager to watch the Patriots do their thing, as though I was nuts not to already be glued to the game. I have been informed that it is very unappealing, and somehow snobby, to say that you don't appreciate football. I am an unappealing snob. 

Happy Friday... er... Saturday! Looking forward to some snow, sleep, and pancakes this weekend.

*footnote: no exaggeration, as I went to hit 'publish', Roo is up. the child that does not sleep!

12 comments:

  1. I too am an unappealing snob, who is married to another unappealing snob. I don't think that a football game has ever graced out TV screen. But even more than that, I so related to your feelings of everything being really good, but also so much work. I have a two year old who still wakes in the middle of the night and another one on her way in a month or so, and I am overwhelmed by the idea that there is no sleep in my future. None.

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    1. Congratulations on your baby on the way, Rachel! It seems like everyone who gets a good sleeper with the first kid gets a lousy sleeper with the second, so maybe you will actually have the reverse luck and be sleeping far more than the rest of us... here's hoping. I do think the sleep deprivation, while cliche, is a massive part of the challenges of parenting in these early years. Everyone talks about it, but you just have no idea until you are in the thick of it. Hang in there, we will sleep one day!

      And I love that I'm getting good support on my disinterest in football:)

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  2. Ohhh I despise football. I feel this sin is even worse in South Georgia! My youngest never sleeps,but is perpetually happy. So bizarre.

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    1. Ha! I'm sure it is more unforgivable in the south April... although Boston is pretty serious about its sports ;) I am so envious of these kids who are chipper with no sleep. If I could sleep until whenever I wanted every morning, I certainly would not be choosing 5AM!

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  3. Another non footballer here-- my husband likes college ball, as all good southerners do, but I never found it entertaining. Along the sleep note, none of mine were ever good sleepers either, but then neither am I. I did manage to teach them to keep quiet and respect everyone else's need for sleep once they hit the age of reason-- and they would happily wake up and play knights (my son) or flip through books (my daughters), allowing the rest of the house to sleep as sleep may.

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    1. I am the worst sleeper, but that is what makes being awakened constantly and without warning even more torturous (even if my genes are ultimately to blame). I can't wait until the 'age of reason'... except they are so flipping cute right now. Why can't we have cuddly babies who are also reasonable?! ;)

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  4. Your kids are so similar to mine! First boy great sleeper, second girl terrible sleeper. Similar ages... and my daughter has a similar doll, while my son has that same gap sweater in the bottom photo:) My daughter woke up 4-5 times per night until eleven months when I put a sleep sack on her. I'd never used one in the past on either child, but came across one that had been gifted to us and thought I would try it out. She slept through the night, and pretty much has ever since. I have no idea if it was just fluke timing or if something about the sack made a difference... but I don't care! The fog finally lifted and we are all much happier. Sleep deprivation is no fun, and I hope your daughter turns a corner soon. I'll agree with the football snob too - I like sports but hate football. Happy Sunday!

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    1. Ha Erika, twin families! We do use a sleep sack (those things are great). It really helped back when my son was a baby, but doesn't seem to impress my daughter. I think we've tried everything, the room is a pitch-black-lavender-scented-white-noise-temperature-controlled cave... and STILL she won't sleep! Sigh, what can you do ;)

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  5. Oh, man, do I know the drill. Not one of my kids was a good sleeper, and it really takes its toll. Hoping it works itself out soon enough, especially given how much else you have on your plate right now!

    And can I just say thank you for the football comment? I HATE it. Most likely more than you do. In fact, I often imagine what our country would be like if we redirected just a third of the money we pour into football stadiums and salaries into a complete education overhaul… but that's a whole different can of worms I guess.

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    1. Sleep deprivation is the biggest parenting cliche that's proven true a thousand fold for me. I know one day they'll be teenagers and begging to sleep in... but these early years hurt! And as for football and money, I have similar thoughts about sports in general and academics. Of course I do value sports and fitness and the mind/body connection... But it feels like the balance isn't there... as it pertains to the dollars at least.

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  6. Have you ever contacted a sleep consult? Just curious what your thoughts are on sleep training. I reached out to one a few months ago because my second little one is ALSO terrible sleeper!! She was amazing and we were able to work out a plan that made sense for our family.

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    1. No Molly we haven't tried that, though we probably should! I have attended so many classes with sleep consultants at earlier phases in our sleep struggles and picked their brains... but truthfully it always felt like I was familiar with the various techniques and suggestions. I'm sure there's good advice to be given though, we should consider it.

      Congrats on finding a plan that works for your family! Lucky you ;)

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