Family of Four

For months after we brought home our second baby, I couldn't actually grasp the idea that we had kids. Not just one child, which somehow seemed like a single, manageable, and isolated leap of faith, but now a group, a unit, two whole human beings relying on us for their every need. If having our first kid before most of our friends joined the parent club felt bold, going for the second in a peer group of reticent procreators seemed outright nostalgic. I self consciously imagined that I was being judged in the way a new convert to some opposing political party, religion, or exercise regime might be... as though having multiple children was a lifestyle choice that now radically reframed the character of our family. 

The practical reality was that having another baby didn't change our day to day rhythm much. James and I were the same people (if maybe a bit more tired and irritable), Little Smith was the same character, and we were all lucky enough to have this new drooling baby ball of sunshine, along for the ride. 

And for the better part of her first year, that is exactly how our Roo rolled. She napped when and where she could, bounced on my knee through her brother's classes and marathon potty training sessions, eventually crawled around on the floor at his doctor's appointments and preschool drop-offs... she was just there, wherever we needed her to be, and asking little more than an interrupted sleep cycle in exchange for her good nature. 

Of course babies do grow. I had done this part before, and so I embraced each of the bittersweet milestones that marks a first year of life. And with each one came an adjustment; eating real food, crawling, walking, talking, demanding, discovering that she may be sweet, but she ain't no pushover... our little girl gracefully, yet forcefully, carved out more and more space in this family, until one day I looked around and realized how much our second child had truly changed everything. 

It turns out that parenting these kids is indeed a lifestyle choice, one that I realize is common and expected in many crowds, and hardly warrants this degree of reflection. However conventional, these changes in our family do feel profound, and the shift from single child to two has been both gradual and substantial. Our current reality includes far more teamwork, communication, compromise, often sacrifice, and always love. The shape and structure of our challenges and blessings will look completely different in another year, and again in another decade, but there is comfort in knowing that we're on this ride together. It's clear that we were somehow meant to test and learn from one another, and I imagine we all feel ridiculously lucky (and occasionally cursed!) to be part of this family of four.

*these pictures are all from apple picking last week-end. i'm convinced that it's impossible not to have a good time while picking tasty treats. note to myself that there's a couple additional shots from this day here, and if you'd like to see our family pick throughout the ages, check out this, this, this, oh and this... i haven't even shared blueberry picking from this year yet, as i'm waiting to test out our jam (get excited!). we are just a bunch of pickers ;)