It's kind of amazing seeing these pictures (which look to me as though someone grafted two bodies together spliced just below the bust!), but even at this late date I still often forget that I'm pregnant. I can barely bend over, struggle up the stairs, and can't clip my own toenails... and yet I find myself trying everything as I normally would and just sort of confused as to why it isn't working. I'm constantly surprised when I bump into a wall because there's more of me than expected.
I think this is just part of a second pregnancy. I have another child to look after this time around, and lots to accomplish before our little girl joins us. I am trying to make a point to find a quiet moment each day (usually nap time) to just sit down and talk to this baby. I want her to know that even though we are all racing around and I'm not putting speakers full of Mozart and the Grateful Dead to my belly, which we did often when I was pregnant with Little Smith, we already love her so so much and can't wait to meet her. Hopefully she is getting used to the chaos of our noisy household and will feel right at home when she decides to show up.
She is still a mover and a roller. I am getting so little sleep that I'm nearly delirious, but it isn't for lack of trying. I'm mostly relying on chamomile iced tea, but nothing has really been working. It's also starting to get hot and humid. I have an AC unit in that Amazon shopping cart just waiting for me to pull the trigger. We have never slept with air conditioning and are big believers in fresh air, but as I said, I'm thinking this is going to be the year that I cave... maybe.
Little Smith still doesn't seem to understand much about this baby sister on the way, but he is helping his two indecisive parents whittle down our name choices. Of course everything sounds pretty cute when a two year old repeats it, but I think we've (almost) made a decision.
My next appointment with the mid-wife is a week from today. That was the visit where my high blood pressure showed up very suddenly with the last pregnancy, and I am a little rattled worrying that it's going to happen again. Everything has been so completely different this time around that I keep telling myself it's going to end more smoothly and this will be a full term baby. I was doing so well with that positive thinking, but as the date gets closer the anxieties are harder to push away. I know that whatever the path, the outcome will be a beautiful and healthy little girl and I'm trying to surrender to the fact that it's totally out of my control.
It's exciting to be getting close, I can't believe how quickly it is racing by. I just keep doing my best to savor this precious and fleeting time.