My birthday is coming up this week-end and I'm always extra nostalgic when May hits. I never actually felt like an adult until I became a mother and even now it sometimes surprises me that I'm in my thirties and a veritable grown-up.
I've written about my mother's home and how my childhood room is more or less in tact, just the way I left it when I went off to college so many years ago. Some things have been moved around or stored away... but it's pretty close to a time capsule. We've recently started to make some changes so that the room can be a space for Little Smith (Big Smith thinks this is long overdue and doesn't have as much reverence for my collections and childhood decor!). I'm actually taking the changes in stride, I guess I've had more than enough time to prepare for the transition.
A few weeks ago we were at my mom's dog sitting while she visited some friends. It was a gorgeous warm day and the boys were playing with Blue (the dog) out in the yard. I'm still not sleeping well so even with the sunny skies I decided to take some quiet time to myself and attempt a nap. Instead of the guest room where we were staying, I climbed into my old bed in my childhood room. It felt like home; the view of the river in the sunlight, the bed frame that my mother restored and painted with flowers, my books labeled with little stickers by title (because I was that kind of kid), my collections of rubber balls and all things Beatles. This space is slowly transforming and soon it will be filled with new collections and my old ones will find new life with my son. I fell asleep in my old bed and woke up to my favorite guys crashing pots and pans and making supper. Change is good.